Joke thread

Completely off topic!
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Wind Waker
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Wind Waker »

beeaye wrote:Qld Police report finding a man’s body in the Brisbane River near the Victoria Bridge.
The dead man’s name will not be released until his family have been notified.
The victim apparently drowned due to excessive beer consumption.
He was wearing black fishnet stockings, a red garter belt, a pink G string, a strap on dildo, purple lipstick and a Vote for Bill Shorten T-shirt.
He also had a cucumber in his rectum.

The police have removed the Vote for Bill Shorten T-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment.
Nice :)

Did they also remove the kevin 07 singlet he had on under it?
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Joshua »

Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 at me today, I'm ok, most of my injuries are super fish oil.
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Brute »

So what if I cant spell Armagedon

It`s not the end of the world .
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Re: Joke thread

Post by 4liters »

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Re: Joke thread

Post by Jordo »

Time spent in the ocean is time spent living.
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Re: Joke thread

Post by cheaterparts »

It was April and the Aboriginals in a remote part of Western Australia asked their new elder if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild
Since he was an elder in a modern community he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the tribe should collect firewood to be prepared.
But being a practical leader, after several days he had idea.
He walked out to the telephone booth on the highway, called the Bureau of Meteorology and asked, 'Is the coming winter in this area going to be cold?'
The meteorologist responded, 'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold..'
So the elder went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood in order to be prepared.
A week later he called the Bureau of Meteorology again.
'Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?'
The meteorologist again replied, 'Yes, it's going to be a very cold winter.'
The elder again went back to his community and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.
Two weeks later the elder called the Bureau again. 'Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?' he asked.
'Absolutely,' the man replied. 'It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters ever.'
'How can you be so sure?' the elder asked.
The weatherman replied, 'Our satellites have reported that the Aboriginals in the north-west are collecting firewood like crazy, and that's always a sure sign.'
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Babylon »

cheaterparts wrote:It was April and the Aboriginals in a remote part of Western Australia asked their new elder if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild
Since he was an elder in a modern community he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the tribe should collect firewood to be prepared.
But being a practical leader, after several days he had idea.
He walked out to the telephone booth on the highway, called the Bureau of Meteorology and asked, 'Is the coming winter in this area going to be cold?'
The meteorologist responded, 'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold..'
So the elder went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood in order to be prepared.
A week later he called the Bureau of Meteorology again.
'Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?'
The meteorologist again replied, 'Yes, it's going to be a very cold winter.'
The elder again went back to his community and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.
Two weeks later the elder called the Bureau again. 'Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?' he asked.
'Absolutely,' the man replied. 'It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters ever.'
'How can you be so sure?' the elder asked.
The weatherman replied, 'Our satellites have reported that the Aboriginals in the north-west are collecting firewood like crazy, and that's always a sure sign.'
:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :thumbsup:
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Galey
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Galey »

YouTube...the gift that just keeps on giving.

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Re: Joke thread

Post by Hvalross »

Brilliant story Cheaterparts ..........11/10
When all else fails........read the instructions!
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Steve_R »

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